My life is in pieces at the moment.. this low is taking its toll on everything, my health, my confidence, my ability to connect with people & on my relationship..
I know I have many faults & believe me I really do… everyone one around me blames me for everything that has gone wrong in their lives, I truly believe now that this is a fact !!! as I am the *common denominator* every time.
I can’t seem to get it together or make things better… I try but fail, I never set out to annoy or hurt anyone it’s not in my nature it’s just not me.. I’m surrounded by so much hate & its my own doing.
Bipolar is a curse & it has ruined my life..
I hate me.. I am the ultimate waste of space.. & the world is a worse place for having me in it !!
I’m sorry for all this depressing crap, I don’t want anyone’s sympathy just understanding… I just needed to off load & get stuff out my head because it is about to explode..
Thanks for taking the time to read my ramblings..
x
Missy Manic 
You don’t want it, so I won’t give it to you. No sympathy.
…But I do understand. That’s true.
That is all I ask… & I thank you for it !! x
Although I’m an Artist, I could not begin to imagine the thoughts that go through your head and the reasoning behind them. For that reason, I hesitate on making a comment or making it too detailed, at the risk of causing offence or adding to your pain. So, I will keep it brief.
We all have periods of highs and lows, where are judgements of our own self-worth is clouded by the chaos of life. I would assume you have these feelings but in a magnitude beyond my comprehension. That aside, there is no place for people to blame you for what has happened to them. Firstly, because we all must take resposibilities for our own actions and path in life and also for the fact that it is counter-productive to the frustrations of life you face.
I know little about you but in the short period of communications, I have seen a spark of a woman that has warmth, a sense of humour/fun and a talent for art that you must not be allowed to be “put under the bed”. Focus on what you offer life and not on what people blame you for taking out of life.
Peace and good luck to you this week.
**Thank you** for this comment it set off a trail of thoughts that I hope to put in to a kind of action plan (for want of a better words)
On reflection, I feel a tad embarrassed about my post now.. but it was a fair description of what was going on in my life & mind yesterday.. So instead of deleting it (which is what I’d normally do) I shall leave it as a reminder of the dark times.. So in the coming days, weeks, months I can look back & see how far I’ve come !! x
Yeah, don’t ever delete them. These are snap-shots and they are true and real even if only at the moment we commit to pushing that post button.